I would like to float and float on the sea, and to not notice this world where everything tries to reject you. I do not know why, but it seems to me, that I've been already floating for a long time on the sea in a unknown direction, alone with myself, without the right to coast, like in ancient novels where people doom to loneliness. Sometimes it seems to me, that the loneliness it is good, but because of it they go mad sooner or later. And I aspire to find as soon as possible the coast, and to embrace people, who are so dear to me. Probably, it is silly. But I know, that being constantly one, lose feeling of a generality. And I float further from this world where the reserves rule, and there is no world for such romantics like me. But I know, there will be a time when my sail will weaken, and I shall remain on a place to be lost far from the world where as a matter of fact, every person is so lonely.

I float from that pain that has wrapped up the Universe. From those in whose eyes I read indifference. Who has died a long time ago, or is going to commit suicide. I float from the terrible world where I do not wish to be the slave to someone's illusions. I float from this world away because I do not trust more in reason. I do not trust neither in love, nor in friendship. Neither that, nor another simply is not possible. People live by reason. Or by fear. And I am afraid, that I shall sometime forget how to love in the world where love and friendship is betrayed. Everything is on sale and bought. May be and this sea on which I am floating is also bought by someone.

And I rush in full sail before someone's hatred will not destroy me. Sometimes, I wake up, and I think, whether correctly I have acted, having selected loneliness in the sea but when I think that in that world I actually was needless to anyone, I inflate sails more strong and I rush there where the wind of changes will relieve me for ever of an idea, that I live in vain, in the world where no one needs me. If I was able to lie and live in that emptiness in which many of those who and has not understood me live, and never could construct the ship, and I never would see the sea, this shelter for lonely hearts. But I am not such as all. And save me God of being such like all. Every day to cause favourite people a pain; to see how they suffer because someone simply does not suffice courage to tell them the truth, about that you're needless to nobody. It is unfair, that someone and could not prove, that he deserves love, and simply friendship. Friendship by choice. Who is better, who is richer. I do not wish to choose. It is silly. The person always should have chance, chance for friendship, for love. The life costs that. The death does not. When the person tried all his chances, he chooses death.

I know, that I shall die as soon as the storm begins, but I also know, that there will be hardly a person who recollects me. I did not have chances for friendship, a fortiori for love. I am absolutely alone in this sea. Perhaps, this is to the best, I do not like people cry. The death doesn't cost tears, especially of mine.