The Ring

Move away, so I could see the vessels
In the shallow waters of my heart
Tear tortured memory apart  
I am no longer your apprentice 

Hand in hand together yet alone
Burning up without looking down
Love is just another useless noun 
Even when you see it carved in stone

Move away, so I could learn to whisper
I"ve been screaming for the past decade
And my consciousness began to fade 
All because of you my gloomy master

What will I become without light?
Who will I protect without children?
Look under the bed you"ll see me hidden
Broken in a middle of the night

                            ***

What do I make of this?
Which way to turn?
The head becomes 
As heavy as the wrist 
What do I learn?

The storm inside
Is powerful and yet
I look for ways
To conquer it and then
I shall forget

Forget his smell
His smile his goodbye
Will I succeed in it?
Pretend? 
Or even try?

What do I make of this?
Half sober half awake
Is this my other self
That"s on the run?
That gets away

What was the meaning?
What did I just loose
The heart becomes 
As heavy as the chest
What do I choose?  

                          ***

For quite a while I have served the self 
With limited and limitless ambition
But on the verge of losing all I have
I disobey the rules and pay tuition

I choose the path of growth and uplift
Instead of dissolution and corrosion
So when the poles for once begin to shift 
I will be ready to ingest the potion  
 
                           ***

There"s no need to close my eyes
In order to see you again
The truth may be full of lies 
The pleasure is full of pain

There"s no need to pronounce your name
In order for you to hear
The pride may be full of shame
The laugh is a lonely tear

There"s no need to address the gods
In order for us to manage
The right may be full of wrongs
The builder can cause the damage

Whoever you are my friend
Wherever you are my lover
My sky will become your land
Your light will become my cover

                           ***

Hold on to it - no matter how hard
No matter how long, no matter why
Hold on to it - don"t let it fall apart
Just as the sun holds on to endless sky

Just as the grass holds on to planet Earth
Without questioning or even slight regret
Just as the wind holds on to hidden force 
Hold on to it - no matter how sad

Hold on to it - and it will hold you back
In peace, in place, in time, in every way
So when you sense my breathing on your neck
This holding on would end and I could stay 

                             ***

I cross the bridge of happiness and sadness
I see dark waters of my soul resign
I"m on the bed of sanity and madness
My skin as useless as a traffic sign

I plant the tree of loneliness and wisdom
It might improve my skill of waking up
Still what"s the point to wake up in prison?
And does it really matter if I stop

I learn the game of chaos and ambition 
My school was never meant to be destroyed
Forgiveness is a road to intuition
At least for now while they"re employed 

I cross the bridge of magnitude and reason
It hurts but it"s a proof that I"m alive
The seasons change and I will change my season
And I will love you and in love will thrive

                         ***

It has to stop
It"s getting to intense
The tears drop 
Without making sense

I say "let go"
Yet I"m holding tight
I have to grow
Ether left or right