Ошка Эз : другие произведения.

Patent application No. Kj 7777777

Самиздат: [Регистрация] [Найти] [Рейтинги] [Обсуждения] [Новинки] [Обзоры] [Помощь|Техвопросы]
Ссылки:
Школа кожевенного мастерства: сумки, ремни своими руками
 Ваша оценка:

   Stephen Bark
   14 Nov. 2000 - November 5, 2002
  

PATENT APPLICATION NO. KJ 7,777,777

  

REPORT OF ANGEL-VOLUNTEER TO SUPREME DIVINE BEING

(disguised as fiction, intentionally written in a frivolous style)

Prologue

  
   Passover already came, yet spring wasn't felt. Cold, dream days with a dim, sulky sun in afternoon and downpours at night seemed to be rather extension of Israeli winter. The radio transmitted bad news and forecasted bad weather.
   Day after day, morning skies were ashy, yet it only began to prepare its armies for the fight. Near dinnertime the whole heavenly artillery was already on course. Clouds, ragged and large and veiling the entire sky, were dirty plum, as if drunk with ink.
   Often a rain began in afternoon with insinuating drops; a real flood broke out later, as a day was close to end. Scandalous thunder peals, lightning flashes, like pauses on note sheets, and wind's howl through home pipes made a discordant orchestra that, in a bewitching way, harmonized with the framework of our three-dimensional universe. This symphony was conducted by the most mysterious director of the times, called Time.
   Close to midnight frantic thunders bellowed like thousands of firearm volleys, lightning was about to burst into houses. By that time even a careless and drowsy housewife had anxiously shut her windows - it was unusual weather for this season in Israel...

1.

The Sign

  
   It all happened in Adar 28, 5570. The holiday was already over. Two days before Passover Dr. Harry Whiz, Patent Manager, thirty years old, tall and lean, with prominent features and sad eyes - that last so typical for Jews - like every self-respecting Jew had made his wife and his mother-in-law sweep leaven bread off the house. During the holiday Harry honestly had eaten matzos instead of bread and on the holiday evening he had left a glass of wine on the table for the prophet Elijah Hanavi.
  
   Today, as always after holidays or Saturdays, Harry was about to be late for work, which meant, he was in a hurry.
   At 8.25 a.m. Harry pulled his car out of the garage. Opening the car door, he cast a glance at the sky, where Whiz, actually, had nothing to look for.
   Well, when he was on holiday and not in a hurry in evenings, then he could bring out a table onto the lawn, sip tea with the family and fry kebabs. In case that the sky was clear, it was possible to observe stars that always added romanticism to the current. But why do this in the morning on the way to work? Did Whiz want to learn what the weather was like? It was doubtful, the Israeli Weather Department had excellent record of service and Whiz's umbrella had been on the back seat since last week in case of a promised rain. The rain carried out obediently the Weather Service orders, as though it worked on a percentage basis.
   Was it Whiz's intuition that directed his eyes upwards? Maybe... So, Whiz lifted his eyes and ... and what he saw forced him to freeze in his place with the superstitious fear. It wouldn't be out of place to add that Whiz was a religious Jew. However, even if he were not religious, the result would be the same. Anyone, to tell the truth, would be rooted to the spot.
   There was a sign in the sky.
   " It's strange, radio said nothing about the sign," thought Whiz, not realizing how this thought was confusing.
   The first tank rolled out from behind a tattered cloud that looked as if it was nipped by a moth. In the following instant the sky was filled with long-range artillery, tanks, cannons, all weapon attributes, obviously, from the Second World War, and running soldiers "under" helmets, sub-machine guns across their chests. The toy soldiers were blowing up open-mouthed in a shout, cannons were spiting fire from both sides - no sound came to Whiz's ears; planes were throwing tiny bombs, no bomb reached the ground, melting halfway.
   And in very heat of this chaos, from behind the same pathetic torn cloud an ordinary white donkey stepped out with a rider on its back. From below, in a strange way clearly, Whiz could observe both the donkey and its owner, who was a man with a thick, striking-ginger beard and blue eyes of an extraordinary brightness.
   Moreover, Whiz even made out freckles, plentifully scattered on the rider's cheeks. The clothes on the man were worn and had obviously been considered stylish in Biblical times: a striped white-black shirt reaching the toes, looked like a woman's nightgown of today, a large white shawl covered his head. The man rode the donkey by a little whip, now and then urging it with his bare feet into its flanks. From time to time the rider bent to the ear of the beast, he whispered something soothing, clattering with his tongue.
   So, nobody noticed them, unhurriedly they passed through the battle, which was already developing the breadth of the sky. The donkey and its rider didn't even touch any fighter or any military device. In a pair seconds they disappeared behind the skyline, as if turned over the framework of a huge picture.
   Whiz closed his eyes and shook his head. It was easier for him to picture that there was nothing in the sky with the closed eyes. But at first, even through his closed eyes he could distinguish some sparking white spots and dark silhouettes with their edges glimpsing fleetingly. Then gradually, the sparks scattered in the darkness, the silhouettes turned pale.
   As the matter of fact, when Whiz opened his eyes the vision in the sky had already vanished; all was now as usual, as should be. Whiz suspiciously squinted at both sides of the street, searching for eyewitnesses, somebody else who was overwhelmed in the same way as he was. Nobody was nearby. Whiz felt, as though he woke up from deep sleep, his shock went. He engaged the gear and concentrated on the road, knitting his eyebrows. In a few minutes later his thoughts about the heaven sign evaporated as a track of the fame, having made a way for the other, more essential thoughts...
  

2

Waiting

   Dr. Harry Whiz was standing opposite the window in his study. Being a doctor of chemistry, he began his professional career, as a patent editor of chemical, pharmaceutical and biotechnological inventions, in a Patent Office in Jerusalem. After five and half years, he was promoted to a Patent Manager.
   His disheveled chestnut hair, untidy clothes and awkward gait made him look clumsy, but good-natured person. Though, everything concerning his work had to be in perfect order. Whiz wasn't strict with the subordinates, neither hastening nor pressing anybody. But if a letter to a client contained more than three mistakes, he would begin cursing aloud, that fucking office, where nobody wishes to work or to think by brain. Sometimes, enraged, he would pick up files off his desk and throw them on the floor; biting his lips nervously, he would tear pieces of paper. Although, he never managed to tear something, that was really valuable. More often it were draft copies of old letters with his marks and corrections. His handwriting was accurate and fine; lines lay equally, they climbed neither upwards, nor downwards.
  
   The place, where Whiz lived, was picturesque and quiet and his marvelous two-storey cottage needed not much of whitewashing. Her wife was a teacher, she taught children-invalids, most of her pupils had of the various degrees brain problems and were mentally retarded. His daughter Sarah, six years old, was really a child prodigy; all Harry's guests said it, one by one. They wondered by her possibilities to draw (she painted in her nontoxic water colors onto all the walls and floors), to sing, to know letters, to count up and down, to ask a plenty of questions. Before going asleep Sarah made her mother go around all over the house, two floors, shut windows and doors, turn off TV and radios. She also woke his fathers at nights to tell him her last nightmare. She was afraid of bad Uncle Arab, who had exploded himself recently in the TV evening news along with the bus full of Israelis. She was already told that there good Arabs and bad Arabs exist and she was sure of that the bad one could creep in through any window, or door, or keyhole, or radio or TV-box and then..., she never finished saying this then, though. Harry was always sleepy and annoyed and vented his irritation on the subordinates but he resisted angrily his wife's suggestion not to watch evening news. They had got out of the situation having bought one more, small TV-set and hung it in the laundry-room. Their daughter never thought of looking in there.
  
   Now Harry was waiting for a new client who was just about to come.
   Yellowish clouds of tobacco smoke from his cigarette drifted up towards the ceiling and then away into a half-opened pane. Slight breath from the working air-conditioning system was sweeping dust off books and shelves.
   The odor of chicken soup from the office kitchenette penetrated through the vertical slit between the door and the wall of his study. Mixed smells of dust, tobacco and chicken soup gently tickled his nostrils.
   Because of these smells Harry always kept an air freshener in his bookcase. When the smells became strikingly unbearable, he would open the window widely, spraying carefully all around. Sometimes, if these simple measures didn't help, Dr Whiz would jump as a bullet out from his study, fly further through a narrow corridor towards the kitchenette, and bang its door with crash, sounding like gunshot.
   Now he felt that he had got a little hungry but didn't move. Thoughtful, he looked through bulletproof glass out onto the street's flowerbeds, where flowers had been churned into dirt by heavy boots of fighters. The exchange of gunfire could be heard from outside; Arabs were shooting at Jews and Jews were firing back - regular thing in Jerusalem.
   Luckily, there were no civilian casualties today. But Israelis knew times when the deadly harvest from gunfire and vivid bomb-suicides had been really horrible...
  
   Consumed with the last news, Whiz recalled as tomorrow in evening, he had caught his wife busy in a funny way: she was hitting with her clenched fists the screen of TV box, balancing high on her tiptoes. As she was woman plumb and rather low, it was supposed to be difficult for her. TV box swung dangerously under the ceiling. It was a noble mug of BBC journalist, which she had knocked so furiously - his Yaele, who was ordinary mild and gentle. "He lies," she complained. Shamefaced, woman went off the laundry room for evening cooking. Harry mechanically sat down onto the stool, still warm from heat of his wife's bum. After a couple of minutes Harry felt that he also wasn't averse to slap BBC journalist's fat face to compensate some of his acrid comments.
   Imaging what he would answer to this fucking goat from BBC, Whiz began to pronounce the words in whisper, but after clearing his throat he went on louder and faster, appealing to the bulletproof window: "Yes, times are difficult for Jews today. Arabs unleashed, as ever, a new unjust war against us. However, the world blamed Jews for being aggressors and harming Palestinian children.
   And you know it's just as it was expected. You, naive left pigeons, foolish confused Jews, expect fairness from gentiles, don't you? Certainly, you are wrong, my dear left assholes! In the fist place, you are obliged to give back all to poor Arabian terrorists. In the second place, they for thanks will dump you in the Mediterranean Sea. I know, Jewish left pigeons, you declare big love towards your Palestinian cousins, which actually even bigger than that one towards yourselves. You have illusions that if you said, we love you, our Arabic cousins, than following step when Arabs would shed tears and climb to embrace you with gratitude. Don't be so silly, Jewish intellectuals, the next step they would consider you weak and try to kick you out from your home. They wouldn't appreciate your progressive views.
   But you, Jews, should be civilized since the world around is watching you, suspecting you, supervising you. They wish you wouldn't be so civilized, than there is reason to accuse you. You should prove your goodness, since Jew should each his day to prove to his gentile neighbor that he doesn't eat garlic, doesn't throw his stinking socks out of the window and doesn't replace running water in his neighbor's house with vodka. May be, we've had enough of this, Jews? Stop to demonstrate your loyalty to this fucking World, stop to prove that white is white! After all, if they wish us to be such bad gays, maybe we will? What do we lose?
   Of course, there should be no word about to retain former areas to Germany, since it were Germans who were aggressors and it was justified annexations. But there is noting the same when the question is of Jews and Arabs - there are no justified annexations by Jews could be discussed. When Arabs attack Jews, who is aggressor? Of course, Jews! Give back the arias! Give back Israel, Yids, they would say, Don't raise you heads, since you should be silky, otherwise, do you remember how we have made all of you in such-and-such year? That is just as it!
   As more we try to look good as less this World consider us good. Will be bad, Jews! They will not consider us worse than they do, quite the contrary!" and at this point Harry took a glance at the window, imagining as millions of his fellow-countrymen and milliards of the earth-dwellers are delightfully watching him, a new TV Guru. In practice he saw only a cockroach startled by his voice, it fell from the ceiling onto the floor, turned over on its back and made off.
   Nevertheless, Harry took a sip of cola from a glass on the table and continued with his voice slightly hoarse: "Yes, Palestinians, what they are like? They only know to blow up themselves and our civilians. His leader Arafat would take away last trousers from his Palestinian citizens. How they can live well under such dung? Who is responsible for this except themselves?
   I know what would you ask next, Jew, who has no place to live in, no place in whole world where you wouldn't fill homeless, except Israel.
   There are a lot of countries in Arabian world and you would ask why they with all their oil-money don't help to their Palestinian brothers, why they don't take them to live in their reach Arabian countries. You ask also why the whole World stands in Israelis' way when they try to help themselves?
   And world if they were honest with you would answer as follows, We need this leash of hungry and miserable dogs nearby your bums, Jews. Moreover, we are interesting to keep them hungry and miserable on the purposes, since our need is to keep them in the working conditions, the starving dogs would better tear your bums. That means, in the case that we would wish to make you, Jews... Clever Jewish heads, you are idiots if you don't understand that we wish you to be without your country and without your military, since we would make you much easier so. And your money, big Jewish Moneybag, is not your State, you are wrong. Your money wouldn't rescue you, as it already was, was, was," at this point Harry fell into significant silence. Then pausing for breath he lifted his forefinger prophetically up: "Yes, World is blind to perceive, as it had always been with human history, that aggression and pathological hatred - now it's of Islamic World - towards Jewish people have jeopardy to spread, as plague, towards other peoples of Earth. But oil-concerns of civilized countries predominated on fairness and common sense.... "
   At this same moment a soft knock on the door interrupted this passionate, but dismal speech to the window.
   "This is, surely, my client!" - Harry eagerly exclaimed. He tidied up his suit, fixed his necktie and then opened the door...
   For an instant he could not move, overwhelmed and gaped, like a fish out of water. He was trying to produce any words, but with no success. Something was clearly wrong with the client's appearance and shocked Dr. Whiz with unusual surprise. What? He got it only after few seconds...
  

3

The Mysterious Client

   The client looked as though he had just descended from pages of the Torah... Harry saw his long striking-ginger beard hiding a half of his face, blue eyes of an extraordinary brightness, plenty of freckles scattering on his cheeks, a white shawl covering the head, classic white-stripy clothes dropping to his feet... White calm donkey stood beside him... That all reminded Harry something from the recent past. But what?
   "Who are you? " - asked Dr. Whiz
   " I am the inventor, of course. Haven't you been expecting me? Or... perhaps I'm mistakenly in the wrong place? This is the Patent Office, isn't it?"
   "Yes, this is the Patent Office." - mumbled Dr. Whiz.
   "I have brought the Patent Application for you"- the new client started eagerly - "It must be filed right away. The deadline is tomorrow... Son, are you all right? Why have you got so pale?"
   "I am all right" - muttered Dr. Whiz hoarsely - "But... tell me, please, mmm... what... is this miserable beast doing here?"
   Looking with horror on the donkey, he recollected, as a month ago, his daughter had dragged a puppy home. Whiz had desperately struggled with the invasion, but he had lost. The puppy had soon peed on all their carpets; a smell of military toilet had stood steadily in home. Whiz had scratched his head constantly - it had been seemed to him that plenty of fleas had been jumping on him. The wife had patiently explained to him, that fleas don't run from dogs on people and that is only his nerves' playing. All had ended when the puppy had peed into Whiz's most expensive shoes. From this very moment he hadn't anymore listened to wails of his daughter and wife - the chief defenders of all, called wildlife. Harry simply shoved the impudent creature in his road bag and took it away to the most far living relative.
   The Visitor as if guessed Dr Whiz' anxiety.
   "It is all right, son. This little donkey' is with me. It is my car, actually. Do you see? And please, don't worry, fleas do not go over from animals to peoples", he repeated the wife's words.
   Donkey, who was tranquilly chewing its lips in that moment, lifted up its melancholy and oriental eyes and looked at Harry with such a reproach as though it could understand English. Harry felt himself shamed.
   "May-be, we'll go on with my invention, eventually?" asked the visitor.
   "Yes...Yes, I see. Please, come into my office"- Dr. Whiz said...
   Dr. Whiz took off his golden glasses, which fogged up surprisingly. He rubbed them thoroughly and then settled back slowly. Still hesitant, he picked up the first page of the document. Hypnotized, he stared at the thick yellow sheets. The paper looked like parchment, very ancient, with shabby edges and at least of 100-200 years old... or 1000-2000 year old... or... He gazed with eyes wide open at these papers as if it were not papers at all, but a poisonous cobra, split tongue hanging out, smelling for its prey.
   Eventually, with a great care he began to read. After a few minutes of reading, the papers fell from his hands. His eyes were fixed stunningly on something beyond the ceiling...
   "It is unbelievable! It is nuts... Only in deep insanity, someone could consider that document as genuine! It's obviously a fake! Hoax!"- he thought... But how could he be absolutely sure?
   And in this moment he imagined dreamily, as it all could be if it was truth. At first his thoughts intermingled in fuss. Where it could be used? Where it could be used? The fist thing that he recollected was his wife, his lovely sweet girlie, Yaely, as he called her flatteringly. He imagined her turning away from him in midnight, snoring slightly in a dream and making smacking sounds with her full childish lips in reply to his draft gentle pats and touches. She was a really big deal, his wife. If his tempting attempts eventually woke her up she would fly away his hands in indignation, and then turn on the other side in further snore. "Could I try this invention on her, may be?", but he didn't finish this idea, in a following instant Harry clearly heard his daughter's tinkling as a bell voice, asking him: "Dad, why do Arabs hate us, Jews, so hard? Why do they want to kill us? Why do they want to kill me?" He recalled also as she had made her inmost wish when her first milk tooth had fallen out. This was his wife who had told her, smiling in that up-to-down way, which adults usually afford with kids: If you put your milk tooth under the pillow and make the wish it will come true. And then this stuff had happened again, when the one more bus had blown up, this time on the Allenby in Tel-Aviv. May be, it was her stupid baby sitter who told Sarah about five Jewish casualties who had been killed in this terrorist act, or Sarah had heard it in radio, but there were, actually, much more victims. It all is usually found out in a few days later when some more injured die in hospitals.
   She is only six years old, his daughter. Why should she make such kind of wishes, and not another one about sweets or toys?
   That was after Allenby when his daughter asked her mother with reproach: "Mammy, you were kidding me, weren't you?" "What are you talking about, Sarah?" asked his wife. And Sarah said out loud in angry whisper: "I was asking for the piece when my milk tooth fell out. Where is this peace, mammy? You promised me!"
  

3.

The Document

  
   Now it is necessary to bring a reader's attention to some, the most important for further understanding parts of this strange document...
  
  
   Patent Application No. KJ 7,777,777
   Title: A Miracle, The Method to Work It and Uses Thereof
  
   Inventor: Messiah Ben David
   Applicant: Torah & The Bait David Corporation
   Priority Data: Nisan 1, 0001
   Priority Country: Kingdom of Judah (KJ)
   Deadline to file in Israel: Nisan 1, 5570
  
   Prior arts cited:
   1. Torah (a Jewish Bible according to the Masoretic text);
   2. Bible (The Old and New Testaments);
   3. 'The Other Side And Back -- A Psychic's Guide to Our World and Beyond' by Sylvia Browne;
   4. 'Harry Potter' by J. K. Rowling and
   5. The Holy Writs of the Earth.
  
   Technical Field of the Invention:
  
   The invention is related to a Miracle in all of its manifestations. The invention further relates to the universal method of creating miracles, as well as to uses of miracles.
  
   Background of the Invention:
  
   The first Miracles relate to the times of creation of our World. There were seven relative days of the creation, relative, because Time had not yet been established. At first, God settled the Upper Atmosphere and the Earth. Then the Light was divided from the Darkness, obtaining the final velocity of about 300.000 km/sec. The production of the transparent fluid with a chemical structure H2O, called Water (namely Rainwater, Ocean water, Seawater, River water, Sewage water, etc) was the following step, vital for further building of the Nature and yielding of the Life. Furthermore, Stars and Planets were installed, inclusive of the star, named Sun, its Yellow Hot fuse was adjusted properly at the center of the Solar System. Golden Sun had to provide our earth with all its light and warmth to induce affinity between beings' hearts. Silver Moon was instated near the blue vital Earth to save future lovers in darkness of the Night and to supply our poets and poetess with inspiration (GENESIS I-II).
  
   However, the most important Miracle was the creation of first human beings, called Adam and Eve. The Model of this last creation was God himself! Therefore, if you are curious to know what God is like, look for him deep in yourself...
  
   We have to add that these first Miracles of God were not observed and, hence, nobody recorded them.
  
   For the long period after that, our Lord was working hard, trying to set Mankind on the right path. However, the Lord didn't have serious success. The most unusable miracles were worked at this period. For example, God confused all languages, scattering peoples upon all the earth to prevent project of the children of men to build useless Babel tower (GENESIS XI). Well, his children stopped doing this particular sin, though they started building another super towers in all the parts of the earth! Most of all, these street urchins are stubbornly going on to build compositions with their tops reaching the heaven.
   Since, we'll not further attend to such kind of the miracles and move up to Joseph's interpretation of the butler, the baker and the king of Egypt dreams (GENESIS XL).
  
   All people dream dreams. At least once, in their life they dream about something prophetic. In general, most of these dreams have no use, since you never know whether your dream is predictive or not unless it comes true. And it's not explicable what so exciting to show us all these puzzled pictures at night, if we never know what to do with them? How to prevent realization of nightmares or how to tern them to our profit? Somebody knows it? Joseph didn't. Pharaoh lifted up the miserable baker, so for the baker it was better not to know his future. The chief butler forgot the Joseph's good forecast after his restoring, so nothing was usable for Joseph as well.
   Well, the seven thin and seven thick cows of Pharaoh's dream had some use for Joseph, finally. But this happens so rarely!
  
   Furthermore, a Jew, whose name was Moses, worked the most important miracles of the old times (EXODUS II-XIV). He was the first between men and second after Lord who produced some examples of real miracles, very valuable for ancient Jews. But Moses didn't provide any method of the producing a miracle; nor he provided any universe, well-adjusted and many times validated method of producing a miracle, in contrast of the present inventor.
  
   Before Moses learned how to work miracles he was a simple cowboy in the house of his father-in -law and except for his job didn't know anything. He also was pretty much a stammered coward. Hence, when an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a flame of fire out of a bush... Well, Moses was very frightened. But fortunately he was curious like all people...
   From Chapter 3 to Chapter 5 of Torah God tried hard to calm down Moses and persuade him to start working miracles! God promised to Moses the total support and gave him Aaron Levite, who was the best speaker conducting lectures for Jews. But Moses found new excuses to run away. This coward didn't want to work miracles! God was already about to lose all his temper unless Moses finally did something. In this respect, we could only guess why God chose such a slow-witted person as Moses for this complex duty...
   As such, there were known ten miracles, called the Egyptian Punishments. Moses worked some of them with help of Aaron and Aaron worked some of them with help of God. The Lord himself worked a half of the Egyptian punishments. Such a chain-train: God spoke to Moses to tell Aaron what to do.
  
   After Moses learned a little about the method and saw how it was easy to work miracles for God and Aaron, he also dared to try something. For example, he successfully stretched thick darkness in all the land of Egypt for three days.
  
   Finally, even an angel of God decided to implicate in. It happened when the Egyptian army overtook the children of Israel encamping by the sea. As it is known, the angel created the pillar of the cloud between the Egyptians and the camp of Israel. It was cloud and dark to the Egyptians, but light to the children of Israel. As such, no one from the camp of the Egyptians could find the Israeli camp that night. Then Moses stretched out his hand over the sea. It caused the Lord, who caused the sea to go back by a strong east wind. Midst the sea became dry land, and water got divided. The children of Israel went into the middle between water walls and crossed the sea. There was no panic among the people. God was leading them. However, when Pharaoh tried to do the same, the water returned and covered the Egyptians, his army, his chariots, and his horsemen. This last miracle wasn't really a punishment, indeed the death is not a punishment. The death is, actually, freedom. Hence, there were only ten Egyptian punishments and one big stunning Miracle.
  
   We can continue with miracles in the Human history, mentioning affairs of famous magicians, such as Merlin, Paracelsus, Kalliostro, Wolf Messing... Some people could say that such odious figures as Vladimir Lenin, Josef Stalin, Adolph Hitler were also famous wizards ... We wouldn't discuss this point of view, but if we assume, that they were... than they were rather nasty sorcerers...
  
   Summary of the Invention:
   Definitions:
  
   A Miracle is a phenomenon, which all people of the world are dreaming about or wish for, but which is considered impossible in real life.
  
   In all the times, at least one person can be found who talks that he/she has already observed a Miracle or has seen somebody, who observed a Miracle, it was just recently, but always... yesterday.
  
   Furthermore, it is said that a Miracle is not reproducible and it can't be used as evidence in court or in exact sciences. It may be useful in science fiction, though.
  
   What is more, as it is pursued from the Holy Writs (see above cited references) the following statement is the truth: if God is real then Miracle is real as well. Consequently, if any person believes in God then logically he/she must believe in a Miracle. Moreover, if for any person the existing of God is a common knowledge, then the reality of a Miracle should also be a common knowledge for him.
  
   Brief description of the invention:
  
   Someone can work a Miracle only for good purposes, in a case that it's vitally needed by any of Human beings or by Humanity and if any other measurements are useless.
   Only a person who acquaints closely with or either believes that he acquaints closely with the Infinite Power named Absolute Truth, Eternity or God (there is the endless account of the other names) can work a Miracle. A Miracle Worker really should wish to work a Miracle and believe with all his heart that he is trusted to work a Miracle by the help of the above mentioned force.
  
   A Miracle could be worked for benefit of a Miracle Worker, his relatives, or loved ones, or friends or for benefit of someone from a human being to the Humanity, in a case that the miracle working is free of charge.
  
   Miracle working can be paid for if a Professional Miracle Worker (PMW) performs it. PMW is a Miracle Worker (MW), who underwent experience of the Wizardry under supervision of the qualified Wizard for two years at least, and has the license acknowledged by the International Witchcraft and Wizardry Authority (IWWA) (see "Harry Potter" by J. K. Rowling, as the reference).
   If an unprofessional MW tries to charge a client or if a PMW requests any overpayment, in addition to previously agreed, or a MW/PMW acts dishonestly regarding to a Client then a MW/PMW loses his strength to work miracles.
  
   If a MW/PMW couldn't work miracles for benefit of him/herself then there is no reason to expect that this MW/PMW would be able to work miracles for benefit of anybody else.
   A Miracle could be worked by virtue of confirmations following by magic words and enhanced by some of magic gestures or rhythmical movements having magic sense with help of magic stuffs.
  
   There could be any confirmation/wish or there could be several confirmations/wishes at the same time, which a MW/PMW blesses to be come true with help of the above mentioned force, named Absolute Truth, Eternity, White Magic or as powerful and endless as God. There are such confirmations as "I wish to learn Chinese language/ to fly freely/to play soccer"/to travel a lot/ not to work at all/ to be successful businesswoman/to be woman/to be man/to set out for another planet" and so on. There are also such confirmations/wishes as "I want to be healthy/wealthy/married/prodigy/youthful for the eternity" or "I want to have you/my child/my relative/my friend healthy/wealthy/married/prodigy/youthful for the eternity and so on.
  
   There are such magic words as "amen", "so be it", "good heavens", "May heaven prosper the revolution", "thrive the king" or any other word or expression of this kind. A MW/PMW (Magician) may himself produce such a word or any magic expression. It doesn't matter at all which expression or word it is. But what is important that a Magician believes that this word really works. Moreover, magic words can be even indistinct muttering, provided that a Magician believes that it helps.
  
   There are further magic gestures or movements such as wave of a staff, shaking a rod, stroking a magic wand, a sign of cross, bowing, knocking a head, clapping hands, dancing, belly-dancing, tap-dance or something else in the same way useful. Again, it doesn't matter what it is, but a Magician must believe that it really helps to produce a Miracle.
   Furthermore, there are magic stuffs, such as holy water, magic dust, wand, cap of darkness, air-carpet, fastest boots, witch's broomstick, perpetual cauldron, bewitching pipe, cure-all and so on.
   A Magician himself is able to create some needed magic stuff.
   For, example, to create the holy water it is necessary to put a jar of water (H2O) under direct sun beams for about three hours. After that a Magician says any relevant confirmation, for example: "God help me to turn this water into holy water," makes a gesture that is considered powerful by his folk, and finally, says a magic word, for example "amen". Please note that water does not need to be previously distillated or purified. It may be water from a water pipe, pool or any puddle (see prior art "The Other Side And Back -- A Psychic's Guide to Our World and Beyond" by Sylvia Browne). As also folk says, it would be useful to put a bit of silver into the holy water.
   Furthermore, to prepare the magic dust we suggest our own method. Some amount of colored papers should be milled through a Mullinex coffee grinder for two or three times to receive dust. After that any relevant confirmation should be pronounced, for example: " God help me to turn this dust into the magic dust". Magician makes a gesture that is considered powerful by his folk, for example a sign of cross, and finally, says a magic word.
  
   To make a magic wand we would refer person who is interested in this invention to "Harry Potter" of J. K. Rowling. There are a lot of various and excellent examples of wands that can be useful. It is a little difficult to find unicorns or dragons in our World. We have to admit that we don't aware about any place on the earth, where herds of unicorns or flocks of dragons are pastured. Hence, horns of a cow and blood of a snake may be used instead of unicorn horns or dragon blood. However, in our opinion, it continues to be difficult and even dangerous. A cow may not agree to lose its horns and a snake can bite, even to death. Besides, the defense animal organizations may bring an action against you over inhuman treatment of living beings. We strongly advise against this. Much better, take a piece of twig, dry it a little under the sun, plane, paint, pronounce " God help me to turn this twig into the magic wand", make a sign of cross and say "amen".
  
   In the similar manner any other magic stuff can be prepared: a cap of darkness, a air-carpet, fastest boots, a witch's broomstick, a perpetual cauldron, a bewitching pipe, cure-all and so on. A little of fantasy, stubbornness, a confirmation, a magic gesture and "amen" - it is all that is required...
  
  
  

4

It works!

  
   The day was nearly declining. When the secretary, anxious about her boss's office door having been closed for such a long time, burst into the room she saw nothing except the swinging open window. There was unusual stillness behind the window, as she noticed. No gunfire, no a track of fighting was outside. The fighters disappeared as a puff of the smoke.
   The secretary looked for her boss under the table and in the cupboards. Very frightened, she peeped through the window, seeing on the empty street's flowerbeds nothing like her boss.
   Purple roses, white chamomiles and gingery daisies were swinging merrily under the mild breathing of the wind. There was no hint of reining, promised by the weather service yesterday. The sky cleared from clouds completely. A fresh, soft breeze was blowing from outside. Twilight gently came down on the earth. Crickets began their chirping cheerfully...
   At the same time, Dr. Whiz and Messiah Ben David were soaring under the blooming lands of Israel, verifying the magic strengths of the invention. And it was working, really working!
  
   At the very beginning, they broke off the fighting in the Jerusalem, scattering the Jew-blood-seekers-and-warlike martyrs of Allah back into Gaza, and corked distant weapons in Lebanon. Only then, they went over with the numerous peaceful affairs. They replaced all the ugly old buildings with new and elegant ones having a lot of tiny terraces. They formed up the shady bridges with verdure twisting around and curling along the arches under the pavements, highways and roads. They created a lot of swimming pools and palaces with skating rinks all over the Israel. Afterwards, they added enough parallel spaces to Israel to create all that they would like for Jews. To be fair they added enough parallel expanses for Arabs and transferred all them out of Israel onto these new lands. They also invented for earth-dwellers new means of conveyance, which didn't need any oil or another material fuel. It was tele-transportation: a earth-dweller should only imagine the place where he would like to be. All he needed was a small mental effort and in an instant, he was in a desired place. No vehicle, no aircraft, no train, no truck, no car was needed anymore... The oil- fuel of Arabian countries became needless to the earth-dwellers.
  
   Finally, our Reformers created very important and crucial thing, the enormous Dome of Time and Expanses under Israel and gathered all Jews from all over the earth under this Dome, no Jew wished to remain in any other place except Israel. The Dome shut the whole country, and Israel with its entire and Jewish people vanished inside the deep fogs of time and expanses forever...
  

Epilog

Adar 28, 6570

   The time passed and inhabitants of earth forgot that once there were people called Jews. Earth-dwellers forgot completely, where their land was and that they were so hated, such scapegoats. At present, the lands of Israel are considered enigmatic and awful place of earth, the second Bermuda triangle or even worse. Earth-dwellers avoid these lands...
   The Arab countries with their good-for-nothing-oil-fuel were diminished to beggary. Once aggressive, the Islamic World lost all its powers and continues to play an invalid by now. Arabs are scattered all over the earth nowadays...
  
   It is almost the End. But there is a little to add. The inhabitants of the earth always need scapegoats. They vitally need somebody to envy or accuse of when the unfortunate or the bad harvest comes. And now, when Jews are gone for good, when they aren't here anymore, Arabs became new scapegoats!
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
   PatApplic-full.doc 02/04/04
  
  

1

  
  
  
 Ваша оценка:
Связаться с программистом сайта.

Новые книги авторов СИ, вышедшие из печати:
О.Болдырева "Крадуш. Чужие души" М.Николаев "Вторжение на Землю"

Как попасть в этoт список

Кожевенное мастерство | Сайт "Художники" | Доска об'явлений "Книги"